All things, apart from Christ, are meaningless.
All my pursuits are so empty when void of Christ.
The longer I have tried to sustain myself, the more I have fought an internal battle. The more I tried to draw strength from my own shallow well, the faster I dried up. Months of trying to fill that well with other things have pushed me to the point of breaking.

My heart is stirred. Convicted. My throat is on fire, and it's a fire that is starting to extend to the most intimate places of my heart. A desire to find God in the places I have placed substitutes, and where I have made excuses.

The most revolutionary, heart transforming truth I know in this moment is that God loves me so much. That all of these struggles over the past months, all of the pain I faced as consequences of my decisions... it's all been part of a refining process. I'm going through the fire, but it is not setting me ablaze... like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, there is a presence with me in the flames, and the only heat I feel is the burning in my heart to go deeper. To embrace who Christ has made me to be. To enjoy the amazing process of getting to know the heart of my God more.

It's time to face this battle with praise in my heart and my eyes on Christ.