meeting with my maker.

He asked me to meet with Him,
and so I decided I had to prepare.
There was much to do, for how could I go before a King,
in my tattered rags and with my heart in pieces.
I scrubbed.
I washed all the places He would think to look, and then some.
Even behind my ears and under my fingernails,
but to my dismay, I found I was still unclean.
Disappointed and ashamed, I went to the closet
hoping to find an outfit that would hide my filth.
In disbelief, I pulled out rag after rag,
finding nothing suitable to wear before a King.
Moth eaten and torn, I knew they would never do.
Distressed, I decided to address my broken heart.
Too big a job for me to piece back together,
and my emotions too tangled to try,
I then knew.
I wasn't good enough to go meet with the King.
He wouldn't accept my filth, my shame,
my tattered rags or my broken heart.
And so instead of meeting with Him, I hid.

The time I was supposed to meet with the King came,
and it passed.
Minutes ticked by as I sat in my hiding place,
guilt-ridden and ashamed.
And then, a knock.
A knock followed by His voice carrying through the door,
and He said my name.
"Jessica,
Jessica, why did you not come meet with Me?
I waited for you.
I'm still waiting for you.
Please, answer the door. I know you're there."
Astonished and scared, I remained silent,
letting the shock of His persistence sink in.

He knocked again.
This time, fueled by my longing to see the King,
I opened the door, careful to remain in the shadows.
And He asked me,
"Why didn't you come?"

I hung my head.
"King, you don't understand.
I wanted to meet with You.
I looked forward to it, I tried to prepare,
but I can't let You see me like this."

He reached through the door and lifted my chin,
and whispered softly
"There is nothing that could keep Me away.
Please, come into the light.
I long to meet with you, just as you are."

He must be kidding, I thought to myself.
I had been judged before, it was what they always said
until they saw, and they walked away.
But His honesty was reflected behind His eyes,
ringing true with every word He spoke.
And so I stepped out from behind the door.

"See?" I said, redfaced and teary-eyed.
"Surely you do not want to meet with the likes of me."

Slowly, and deliberately
with the most tender of expressions,
and the most gentle of words,
He looked me in the eye and said,
"I love you.
I love everything about you.
I want to cast away your shame,
fill the holes that leave you empty and cold,
and hold your heart in My hands.
I will take you as you are.
Meet with me.
Will you let Me in?"